Saturday, April 3, 2010

Girl With a One Track Mind: Exposed...(review)

From her blog:

"My name is Zoe Margolis – also known as Abby Lee, or the Girl with a One Track Mind.

"Six years ago, I began writing my blog, Girl With A One-Track Mind, which, with complete honesty, detailed the ins-and-outs of my sex life, and my thoughts and feelings about the subject matter.

"During late 2005, I was approached by a publisher to write my first book, based on the blog, which was written under my pseudonymn, Abby Lee. On August 3rd 2006, the book was published....a newspaper decided to ‘out’ me and rid me of my anonymity.

"...My follow-up book Girl with a One Track Mind: Exposed is published by Pan Macmillan..."

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I haven't read her first book ("Girl with a One-Track Mind: Confessions of the Seductress Next Door"), and wanted to before reading this one ("Girl With a One Track Mind: Exposed: Further Revelations of a Sex Blogger")...but was unable to get a copy. I asked Zoe if I should read the first book before the second...she said: "Not necessarily: each book stands on its own. But reading the first will give you something to compare against, however..."

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She begins the book with a position that reads:

"...to get the no-holds-barred low-down on blokes and shagging...it's so nice to have a male friend...to whom I can put my explicit questions and to be able to converse about sex..."

That goes both ways. It's great to be able to bluntly speak with a woman about: what they/she likes and dislikes, and how they/she feels (physically and emotionally).

After reading a few posts, I became a little frustrated because I don't know what year she's writing in: she gives the month and date, but not the year. (But as I'll explain later, I was able to compose a timeline by matching the dates given in the book with other information...)

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Reading her conversations with other women reminded me of a book I read in my late teens, around 1980, titled "How to Make Love to a Woman". That particular book will give young males some hints as to what women might be looking for...

To my surprise, she gives a bad review of the Rampant Rabbit adult accessory. I remember reading about it, and have known those who have purchased and used the device, but never been aware of someone who doesn't like it and its performance. I have known of one woman for whom it was not sturdy enough...she broke it. (The device I've read the most positive comments about is the "Magic Wand", though I've never personally known of a woman who has owned one.)

She mentions her concerns about having enough stamina to meet her expected upcoming encounter(s). I believe most guys find out "the hard way" that we can be outlasted by women. (I've developed a theory that...putting aside the morality of most people...due to they appear to enjoy and need more time during intimate encounters, women could best be served by two men at a time: tag-team titillation, if you will.)

A few more entries past the one regarding stamina...(to my surprise) she addresses the issue of two men and one woman! And, how for most it appears to be more taboo than two women and one man. Which leaves me a little confused, because...to me...morally it's the same difference. I guess it's more because of her preference (and not because of logistics and tactical analysis).

From her postings on her blog, and in her book(s), she has a message for women that I totally agree with: it is the responsibility of every woman to know what she likes, and how she wants to be pleasured...and not to be afraid to share that information. Every woman/person is different and prefers different things. I know of no one who can read minds, and very few that can correctly interpret and translate body language so...yes, ladies...it is greatly appreciated if you can make it as easy as possible for us (men) to know what buttons to push. There have been times when I wished a manual would have been provided before the first date.

On page 275, Zoe states what I just have in the previous paragraph: women need to know themselves, and also need to speak-up (so to speak)...

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As I get halfway through this book, I begin to understand that the first half of it contains writings created before the first book was was published. And I find I am correct: I have now arrived to where Zoe is aware that someone knows that she is the author of her first book.

A newspaper uncovered who she is. And, if Zoe is correctly quoting a voicemail message she received on her telephone, they are threatening to print pictures of her that they have...but if she gives an interview they will allow her to pose for their photographer. I'm not surprised to find that the newspaper is owned by Rupert Murdoch...

What did surprise me was, in an e-mail message to Zoe, the publication will also identify her mother, and her mother's address (in addition to Zoe's address). Why? Why is this necessary? Sometimes you just want to get a baseball bat and...


Because of all of the publicity, she loses her job (because the employer doesn't have the guts to stick by her).

Throughout the book Zoe mentions how she would rather her mother and father not read her (first) book and blog...which leaves me a bit sad for her parents (and her). Only because she says how great her realtionship is with her parents, my belief is that if it is (that great)...their relationships should be able to handle ANYTHING.

As I get towards the end of the book she focuses on her insecurities of having satisfying relationships now that men are aware of the content of her first book. For all of her confidence that we have been exposed to, she appears to (continue to) have flashes of a little regret and intrepidation. I imagine there are many men who would love the opportunity to get to know her to find if she can be the one for them...of course she would need to find them appealing to her, and her needs and desires. Life is a pain in that way, ain't it?...

Because of everything, Zoe has had three identities: Zoe--her family name, "Abby Lee"--her sex blogger name, and "Katie"--a name she has used when dating after the first book was released and she was "outed". I've done the same. Members of family (including my ex-wives) call me by the name my mother gave to me at birth, my nickname ("S!ick") was given to me in junior high school by a student and has carried-over into my professional life, and...when I've felt it necessary...I have created other third identities so I can express myself and not felt the need to filter the content. Like Zoe/"Abby", I have said and posted things that others (in my personal life) took offense to...some as if I were attacking them when all I was doing was honestly expressing how I feel and my position on issues, as well as feeling free to create content of my choosing. I have also felt the need for a facade to explore beliefs and preferences without being falsely accused of anything, and having misunderstandings applied to who I really am.

"Hurrah!", I say to Zoe Margolis/"Abby Lee" for having the courage to contribute to the culture of humankind. Maybe we all might learn a little something more about ourselves and eachother.

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